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It has been a long time since I sat down to write a new post. Today, I want to talk about something that affects all of us: social media applications, and why we desperately need to place them within a strict set of personal rules.
We all know that social media apps are just a small subset of the digital world. Whether we actually need this subset in our lives is purely subjective. No one else can determine whether you should choose to be part of a virtual social world.
These applications are completely free to use, meaning you do not pay them money in exchange for their services. Instead, you pay with your attention. They earn their revenue through advertisements. Because they possess your personalized information (including your likes, dislikes, and comments) they can serve you highly targeted ads.
While some of these ads might occasionally be beneficial, they can just as easily become a dangerous rabbit hole. You might open an app to do something work-related, only to get distracted by an ad tailored to your specific interests. Suddenly, you are browsing a product or a website or a profile page you had no prior intention of looking into. Even if you never thought about it before, the seed of that desire has already been planted in your mind and thoughts. You might stop to think about how this algorithm works, or you might just forget about it later, but the damage to your focus is done and reversing such damage is tough.
Attention is a child of Focus Our collective attention span is rapidly decreasing. Whether this is good or bad depends entirely on the individual. If someone has nothing important to do in life, it is incredibly easy for them to get caught in the trap of social media apps.
On the flip side, consider a person who is totally focused on work that brings genuine joy to their life. When you derive true satisfaction from your daily work, you are far less likely to waste time on social media. You feel less compulsion to check up on what your friends are doing. You simply do not care as much. You set yourself free from the burden of knowing too much about other people’s lives, successfully avoiding the trap of interfering in their lifestyles.
"When your work becomes your love, rest things follow you and don’t come in your path.
Social media creators claim they built these platforms to help people socialize, but that is rarely the true vision. Most of these platforms were created purely to make money. That is the harsh truth.
Every single change in a user interface has a strong psychological reason behind it, all meticulously designed to keep you stuck on the screen longer than necessary. Every border, color, and shape is engineered with intent. Companies train their algorithms based on extensive behavioral research to maximize your screen time. Even the customization options, like changing the color or wallpaper of a chat screen, are regulated features designed to bond you deeper to the application. The founders are just humans who want to earn more money like anyone else, but we have to ask: where is the limit? How far is too far when it comes to playing with the human mind?
If their genuine purpose was to help people socialize, they would encourage people to meet physically rather than chat over a virtual interface. However, the reality is quite the opposite. People are less likely to meet up and more likely to just text. You have probably noticed that the text chat interface is always the primary button to start communication. Many people might disagree with this, arguing that texting depends on comfort, ease of use, or a busy lifestyle. But if you stop to think about it, carrying out a long text conversation actually takes much more time than a quick phone call or video call.
Because of this, I beg to differ from the crowd. I refuse to follow the default social rules of social media apps. The builders of these systems are highly educated, and they are using all of their creative energy to capture your attention.
To combat this, I have built a strict set of rules for navigating these corners of the internet. You can copy them or refuse them based on your own circumstances and situations.
YouTube is the primary platform where I spend time when I am free. I use it for almost everything, especially for learning new things because it is accessible for free with advertisements. To keep it clean, you can block those ads using ad blockers.
I also use it for entertainment, like watching stand-up comedy. Entertainment is excellent when it is strictly regulated by you; otherwise, it will make your life hell. I open YouTube only when I have a specific need. Furthermore, I do not waste my time watching endless podcasts. There is a massive trend right now of spending hours consuming podcasts (those who have jobs or working somewhere are not indulged to such cheap things), but I prefer to listen to true experts who provide relevant data and information. More often than not, I would rather read books and research papers than listen to a host who is not skilled enough to ask proper questions.
I still use Instagram, but I am incredibly selective about how I interact with it. If you do not keep a close eye on the Instagram algorithm, it will eat you alive.
I do not need a virtual space to share my personal stories with close friends. I will share those stories personally when we meet, when they actually want to know and listen. Instead, I use a specific account where I only follow people related to my fields of interest and work. I use Instagram solely to stay updated on those topics so I can become a better person, rather than falling into the trap of a sloppy algorithm.
LinkedIn has essentially become Facebook. Most of the posts are entirely useless, consisting of people constantly sharing certificates and bragging about achievements.
I actively avoid interacting with the feed. I use LinkedIn strictly to keep an eye on updates in job roles and to see how people alter their job descriptions. Frankly, a lot of it is just corporate puffery. People brag about low-impact roles as if they are the Prime Minister or the President of a nation changing the world overnight. While I know that compounding small actions brings a huge impact, posting just to maintain profile visibility is not my cup of tea. Most people do not put their heart or real effort into what they post; they just post for the sake of engagement, even if the content is completely insensible.
I simply do not use it. It is a chaotic mess where everything happens randomly without any value.
Chatting or texting over a virtual interface looks time saviour, you can save a lot of time just using emojis or stickers. But it can also make no emotional engagement with people you talk to. Sometimes it looks least effort putting task when someone putting effort in writing a paragraph. I get it you are busiest than Elon Musk but, to save time, you can avoid chatting and use phone call or video call. It will save a lot of time and energy, no need to worry about waiting for replies. I also get it, it do help in async communication, but whenever possible try to save time over chatting.
The Features Social Media Should Have These are the rules I have been using for years, and I continuously update them based on my evolving requirements.
If the builders of social media platforms genuinely wanted you to use their systems for your own good, they would introduce specific feature flags into their design:
Because the industry lacks these basic rules and regulations, catfish accounts run rampant, children face online threats, and private pictures are leaked across the internet without permission.
For now, I will stick to my personal rules. They are my ultimate reality check in a digital world designed to distort it. What are your rules? Comment below…
If you don’t have defined rules yet, you should build some. Have you ever seen a country without a constitution? I hope not. Nonetheless, you are just like a country. Create your own rules; don’t rely on others.